You are viewing posts tagged 'self reflection'.

Spa Daze

February 26, 2021
In this comic, Robot and Francis relax at the spa.
  • + Transcript

    Spa Daze

    Comic written and illustrated by Ryan Reid

    Panel 1: A seemingly limitless space. GIANT EGGS float in an unseen grid formation above a dark floor, far into the distance.

    Panel 2: CRACK!! ROBOT’S LEG breaks through one of the eggs! Shell falls everywhere.

    Panel  3: ROBOT sits, breathless, on the floor beneath the GIANT EGG he just escaped from. He’s surrounded by EGG GOOP and shell bits.

    Panel 4: FRANCIS wanders in, with a GIGANTIC SQUID THING on her head. She’s enjoying a SMOOTHIE through a VERY SQUIRRELLY STRAW. She is very relaxed.

    ROBOT

    Where have you been?

    FRANCIS

    Hot squid massage. Smoothie Bar. You?

    Panel 5: The dark nothing between time and space.

    ROBOT (Voice over)

    I awoke lost and alone - traversing the dark nothing between time and space. My younger self showed me all the ways we could avoid this inevitable future, and we laughed and laughed. Then I lost $200 playing billiards against the Horseshoe Nebula, ate a light lunch, and took a short nap.

    Panel 6: ROBOT and FRANCIS retire to the SMOOTHIE BAR.

    ROBOT

    It was narrated by Morgan Freeman!

    FRANCIS

    Cosmic Spa Day is the best spa day!

Yearly Problems

January 31, 2021
In this comic, the crows discuss how hoomans blame the year for all their problems.
  • + Transcript

    Yearly Problems

    Comic written and illustrated by Ryan Reid

    Panel 1: Daytime in a nondescript back alley. CROW 1 stands on the edge of a DUMPSTER, while CROW 2 looks up from deep inside the large garbage bin. They are looking for lunch, and not having much luck.

    CROW 1

    I don’t think it’s fair that the hoomans blame the year for all their problems.

    CROW 2

    Wut?

    Panel 2: CROW 1, now chewing on what appears to be discarded electrical wire.

    CROW 1

    Imagine you’re the year, going about your yearly business - changing seasons, renewing magazines, making babies, I don’t know…when suddenly, some hoomans elect a bad leader, start a pandemic, get a lousy haircut, and then blame YOU for all of it!

    Panel 3: CROW 2 is head down in the DUMPSTER,

    CROW 2

    Well, it’s like my Mama used to say - “Blaming celestial mechanics for your problems is far easier than finding lunch in a hardware store dumpster.”

    Panel 4: CROW 1 is now chewing on MATCHES. CROW 2 is entertained as the MATCHES light up, and drop into the DUMPSTER.

    CROW 1

    Too true. Oh, don’t try these stick things. They are not great. 2 stars. Do not recommend.

    CROW 2

    Oh! They light up. That’s fun.

    Panel 5: The DUMPSTER catches FIRE, and the CROWS fly away in a big hurry.

    CROW 1

    ACK! Not fun! It wasn’t me! The year did it! Ha ha!

    CROW 2

    It’s the revenge of the stoopid year! Oh, why weren’t we nicer?! Ha ha!

    Panel 6: The CROWS fly off into the distance, leaving a large PLUME OF SMOKE, and a raging DUMPSTER FIRE behind them.

    CROW 1

    Maybe if hoomans don’t like years so much, they should just stop revolving around the sun.

    CROW 2

    That WOULD make all their problems go away. But don’t give them any ideas.