Magical Thinking
September 30, 2020
-
+ Transcript
Magical Facts
Comic written and illustrated by Ryan Reid
Panel 1: Voices come from a tree, in an old churchyard. It’s the CROWS.
CROW 2
Hey, is that the squirrel that’s got it in for you? It looks angry.
CROW 1
I don’t believe in squirrels, so it can’t hurt me.
Panel 2: CROWS are conversing on a tree branch. CROW 2 is only half listening, more interested in the SQUIRREL farther up the tree, and off panel.
CROW 2
It’s carrying a lot of acorns for such a tiny animal.
CROW 1
In fact, I don’t believe in anything inconvenient, difficult to understand, or harmful to me.
Panel 3: CROW 2 continues to watch the SQUIRREL with some interest.
CROW 2
Oh, wait, his friends have come to help him. That’s nice.
CROW 1
Global pandemic, climate change, facts, squirrels. None of it exists.
Panel 4: CROW 1, who was also only half listening to CROW 2, finally clues in.
CROW 2
Oh! You should probably move.
CROW 1
What? Why?
Panel 5: But it’s too late. The unseen SQUIRRELS bombard CROW 1 with acorns, knocking him out of the tree.
CROW 1
Ow! Ow! Hey! Ow! Stop! Ow! Oh! Hey! Er! Oof! Hey! Ow! Stup- Ow!
Panel 6: CROW 2, unharmed by the previous onslaught, calls down to CROW 1, lying in great discomfort on the ground below.
CROW 2
Good thing squirrels don’t exist, or you’d be in a lot of pain right now!
CROW 1
Stupid squirrels! Stop suppressing my beliefs!