Crows Chewing Gum – Survival Anxiety

Crows Chewing Gum

October 21, 2018

Tags: bully, crows 

+ Transcript
Crows Chewing Gum
Comic written and illustrated by Ryan Reid
Panel 1: CROWS are hanging out in the woods. CROW 1 is blowing a large gum bubble.
CROW 2
Where did you get the gum?
CROW 1
The park.
Panel 2: CROW 1 close up.
CROW 1
Technically, a kid in the park gave it to me.
Panel 3: CROW 2 close up.
CROW 1 (from off panel)
Actually, he threw it at me.
Panel 4: CROW 1 close up, pointing to his beak.
CROW 1
With his mouth.
Panel 5: KID freaking out, claw of CROW 1 is grabbing the gum that has launched out of the
kid’s mouth.
CROW 1 (voice over)
And by ‘threw’ I mean it kind of flew out of his teeth while he screamed ‘Stop bothering me for
my gum, bird! Help! Help!’
Panel 6: CROW 1 blowing gum bubble, while perched atop an Animal Control truck. He’s
watching ANIMAL CONTROL capture SQUIRRELS off panel.
CROW 1 (voice over)
Then Animal Control showed up and thought the kid was freaking out about rodents, so they
arrested all of the squirrels.
Panel 7: CROW 1 close up, angry.
CROW 1
Now the squirrels are mad at me, and I have to go live with my Aunt in Minden until they get distracted by some nuts or something.
Panel 8: CROWS are hanging out in the woods, same as panel 1.
CROW 1 (indignant)
So I ask you - who is the real victim here?!
CROW 2
This is why I only pester old men for licorice.
<div class="no-script"><p style="text-align: left;">Crows Chewing Gum</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Comic written and illustrated by Ryan Reid</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Panel 1: CROWS are hanging out in the woods. CROW 1 is blowing a large gum bubble.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">CROW 2</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Where did you get the gum?</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">CROW 1</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">The park.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Panel 2: CROW 1 close up.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">CROW 1</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Technically, a kid in the park gave it to me.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Panel 3: CROW 2 close up.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">CROW 1 (from off panel)</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Actually, he threw it at me.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Panel 4: CROW 1 close up, pointing to his beak.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">CROW 1</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">With his mouth.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Panel 5: KID freaking out, claw of CROW 1 is grabbing the gum that has launched out of the</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">kid’s mouth.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">CROW 1 (voice over)</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">And by ‘threw’ I mean it kind of flew out of his teeth while he screamed ‘Stop bothering me for</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">my gum, bird! Help! Help!’</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Panel 6: CROW 1 blowing gum bubble, while perched atop an Animal Control truck. He’s</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">watching ANIMAL CONTROL capture SQUIRRELS off panel.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">CROW 1 (voice over)</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Then Animal Control showed up and thought the kid was freaking out about rodents, so they</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">arrested all of the squirrels.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Panel 7: CROW 1 close up, angry.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">CROW 1</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Now the squirrels are mad at me, and I have to go live with my Aunt in Minden until they get distracted by some nuts or something.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Panel 8: CROWS are hanging out in the woods, same as panel 1.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">CROW 1 (indignant)</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">So I ask you - who is the real victim here?!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">CROW 2</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">This is why I only pester old men for licorice.</p></div>
Crows Meet the Gray Jay was published before this post.
Hazel Loves the Printer was published after it.